You have no clue what love is until - your husband is picking you up off the couch while you are screaming in tears trying to make it to the bathroom in time to tinkle for the millionth time that day. you have NO CLUE
This man I married is AMAZING and I spent the last 5 days realizing what a great catch I have.
*disclaimer: while this is a love story, it's more of a medical journal entry so if you are queasy you may not want to continue reading. Just know that a good man loves you "in sickness and in health"
All month my lower back has been killing me. Hello, I'm 3 months pregnant, of course it hurts!
Last Monday when I went to work I couldn't help but grab some ice from the break room and ice my lower back. I've always had a bulge down there I called my "butt bump". It flared up on long drives and hot days. It's where you think a human tail would appear, if that makes sense. I had it flare up to a painful point when I lived in San Antonio and *cringe* one of my med student friends "popped" it and it felt better. It is in a place on my body that I can hardly see, so I'm not sure what it looked like before or after the "procedure". (I was in so much pain, I would have let him cut off my left arm that day).
Fast forward to the present when I'm icing my back Monday and Tuesday with no relief. Come Wednesday I can't get out of bed. Something is wrong. I decide to stay home and switch between ice and heat. Hubby is not happy with my self-diagnosis and wants me to visit the doctor. I don't want to drive an hour to Lubbock for a doctor appointment that might lead to nothing. He suggests a closer (45 minute) hospital where we are friends with one of the doctors, Isabelle. We call and Isabelle is no longer accepting new patients. "Ah-em! Doesn't she know who I am?!" so we text her husband abnd he suggests we use this new doctor and when I say new I mean NEW. Fresh off her residency, this curly blond haired big eyed doctor. At our first meeting I love her, Hubs isn't convinced.
She takes a quick look and says "Oh, it's an abscess. We'll just drain it and it'll go away". Whatever you say lady, I can't even see what's going on. We tell her I'm pregnant and she gets the look of doom "Oh, that limits our pain options and our antibiotics, let me think...." seems like she was thinking FOREVER!! She decides Tylenol will have to do for pain, anesthesia is out of the question and a form of penicillin will do for the antibiotic (grade B so kinda baby safe). She made a small incision to help "pop" the wound. Did I mention no anesthesia? We filled the antibiotics and raced home to rest. It worked for about a day, but Saturday-Sunday there was no progress. Again, I can't see this part of my body so I'm taking hubby's remarks and he's telling me it's actually getting bigger. When he pushes to help it drain the pressure is almost unbearable, but I tough it out. I know he's not pushing as much as he could...he can't stand hearing me scream out in pain.
You may not know, because I am behind on this blog, but I'm about 15 weeks pregnant. This pain keeps me from laying on my back and for some reason laying on my side puts my arms and legs to sleep. So I am forced to lay on my stomach. My bloated, growing baby belly stomach. The kid is not happy. I'm cramping all day, but that is nothing compared to the pain on my back. So I offer my pain to God and just ask that he keeps this baby safe.
Hubs is racing home from work every chance he gets. He's bringing me water, changing my gauze, keeping track of my medication. Unfortunately he has experience with this because his mother had a similar incident, but MUCH for harmful and dangerous. I know he's offering prayers for me and our baby. He's trying to keep me fed, which is hilarious. He doesn't know how to make soup or Kraft mac & cheese. He knows now...his children will thank him.
Monday morning we are back at the doctor. I'm not crying as much, but something is not right. There's no change! Dr. Doogie Howser takes a look at my wound and made an exclamation like "Woah!" just what you want your doctor to say. So she makes another incision, much larger this time, as I cling to my husband for dear life. Again, no anesthesia. Hubs is coaching me through slow breathing so I don't pass out (labor preview??) and takes such a beating. He asks the nurse for a wad of gauze so that I can stop biting him and bite the gauze instead. It felt like my entire weekend of pain just pour out of me. Hubs said the doctor's face was hilarious, good thing I couldn't see it, I would have freaked out. I felt incredibly better after the 2nd cut. If you are interested, YouTube draining of abscess....that's what happened. If you have a weak stomach. DO NOT YouTube that. FYI, I have NOT watched that video.
We head home and within minutes I'm standing and walking around the house, sitting in chairs and feeling AMAZING. I'm an antibiotics for another week and take one more day from work just to stay rested. Hello, I have 2 open wounds on my tailbone. Ouch!
My lessons learned are:
Go to the Doctor I had no clue my little "butt bump" it would flare up THAT large - Thank GOD I am in my 2nd trimester or the antibiotics could seriously hurt the baby's development. I didn't have insurance until this year (1-year probation at my new job) and I got pregnant as soon as I got insurance so this was a Murphy's Law moment
Let yourself be taken care of I wanted to get my own water and feed myself, but it would have only made the pain worse and delayed the healing
Use antibacterial soap Doctor said most people don't use antibacterial soap when bathing anymore. They use the sweet smelling or "all natural" soap (yep, that's me!) and she told me to switch to Dial soap immediately. If you're healthy and "detoxing" with a healthy diet and lifestyle, all those toxins are sitting on your skin. If you don't kill them with soap - where are they going to go? Oo! Oo! I know I know!!! Dial is my new best friend. Hubs heard that if you use it every day your body will become immune to it....but I haven't used an antibacterial soap for YEARS so I'll use it for a while. It smells like my grandma's bathroom.
Pray and ask for prayers My ACTS community has a prayer line that you can request prayers via email. I wrote an e-mail through my pain and tears (it took me 30 minutes to write 3 sentences). As soon as I pressed "send" I felt at peace. As soon as I saw the e-mail distributed on the prayer list the pressure lifted and the next day my Doctor made the 2nd incision. Hubs and I have said rosaries every night this week. I don't say any of this to brag, Christ calls us to be humble. I only say this so you know there IS a higher power who helps us through our suffering and he DOES make change in our lives. Don't forget to call on him and his saints for intervention.
My husband is awesome woah. I knew we would bond over the baby and even in the delivery room. But this week was a pretty cool experience. Things are definitely not back to normal and I don't want them to be. I was completely exposed this week (in more ways than one) and this man didn't run and hide or pass me along to another care taker. He was by my side through it ALL. I cannot picture any other man I dated taking care of me like Farmer J did/does. He's so sad I'm back at work. He wishes I was at home...so he could love on me a little more. xoxo
This reminds me of a Xanga post, all words no pictures! Sorry about that. I wasn't sure what photos to insert, if you have any ideas leave them in the comments!
Grits,
Labels: God, health, married life, sick